written by Al Stewart

Today I feel like Dorothy Parker 
Today I've got the critical eye 
I paint my world just a little bit darker 
Don't even have to try 

Everyone seems a little bit desperate 
Oh so witty, but over the edge 
I don't know why they try to impress you 
With one foot on the window ledge 

That's just the way they play it 
That's just the way they are 
Think up a line and say it 
I'll see you all later down at the bar 

Don't try to understand it 
It won't get you very far 
Even the Great Pretender 
is really as naked a Hedy Lamarr 

Today I feel like Dorothy Parker 
Today I'm up here walking the floor 
The light inside my head getting darker 
Going to leave this town for sure 

One block down and another block over 
There's a place that will make you a drink 
The night is hot, I believe that I'll go there 
A password will get you in 

Play a song by Hoagy Carmichael 
Play that horn like Beiderbecke too 
A glass or two of something you like'll 
Separate you from these blues 

Life is a constant party 
Swung to a shot of jazz 
Even the broken-hearted 
Can steal a feel of the razamatazz 

This is the age of rhythm 
These are the dancing years 
Jump through the mirror with them 
New York has no time for your tears 

Today I feel like Dorothy Parker 
Today I've got the critical eye 
I paint my world just a little bit darker 
Don't even have to try